Ethical Scholar Pillows

'Quit trying to steal my intellectual property.'

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

Ethics exam cheater.

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

Squeezing the Free Press.

Others will fight for you

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

Build your very own conflict of interest!

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

'Loved your bit on market share, Felton - perfect blend of plausibility and outright deception.'

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

"In a further effort to increase profits, control costs and satisfy shareholders, we've decided to steal stuff."

'You won't believe this, but even if the vaccine works, they wont give it to other sick mice.'

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"Hi, Bob - your consultants have just arrived."

This Is What Moral Corruption Looks Like

"Take special note of the change to our policy on honesty."

Gold Medal for IOC boss Thomas Bach in the discipline of Brown-Nosing-Dictators-For-Money.

The Price of Freedom

"Boss... I just read an article about trans-humanism. Apparently, sometime in the next 50 years, it will become possible to live forever."

"Moulting"

'You're in luck. Business ethics is a gray area.'

Stoneage business ethics: 'But, hey, this 'ethics' stuff isn't carved in stone!'

Experience is important, so I'm inclined to leave questions of ethics to those who have them.

"Discussion topic: Is our society becoming less civil and more violent?"

'The bad news is that our company is bankrupt. The good news is that we're only morally bankrupt.'

Tragically Moses didn't see the eleventh commandment.

"I'll tell you, mock jury duty beats cancer testing."

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."

"And here is where we started putting profits before people."