Ethical Money Maker Gifts

"You can take it with you down here - but no social conscience funds."

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

'But I do have fun. I have lots lots of fun. I have lots of fun making money.'

"Well here's my idea: Why don't we try serving better coffee than them?"

"I was a stockbroker first, but when I realized how much time I spent praying, I figured, what the heck?"

'Now all this stuff will finally begin to pay for itself - here's the formula for transmuting lead into gold.'

'But I do have fun, I have lots of fun. I have lots of fun making lots of money.'

'I had a great year and I wasn't even trying.'

'Before we found you, we were just squeaking by.'

'Great, and I'll also need some mirrors.'

Money Tree

'I'm not authorized to talk about that...I'll have to patch you through to our department of unspeakable evil.'

Ethics (with an eye on the bottom line) committee.

'Still, there's a lot of money to be made.'

"Do you want to ruin me?! Take it away!!"

Investments: Yes, we have organic, local & cruelty-free stocks.

"And you call yourself a socially-responsible investment portfolio!"

Student about Biz Quick class: 'It's bite-size information in a 15 minute class that teaches you how to roll in the dough.'

Nasty, Shady, and Gruesome equal Massive potential profits

"I suppose it's too late to start testing on animals?"

"On the one hand, we'll burn in hell; on the other, that's a lot of money."

'That's it agreed then - the company's new motto is going to be 'We didn't do anything illegal'.'

'Generics of generics - that's the way we'll go.'

"I cased the joint, and it turns out they'll just give you money if you work thirty-five hours a week as a teller."

'Now what's all this about a money making scheme?'

"We should appeal to their greed, without, of course, actually appealing to their greed."

CEO slumber

Cultivating money.

'Your business plan needs work, I'm not feeling a tingle of moral remorse.'

Dollar: Warning - May cause excessive greed, loss of human empathy and disregard for vital environmental systems.

'Expensive? Yes, but I don't exploit my mother.'

"That's a very convincing strategy."

"I refuse to exploit my mother."

'Bob, we know that you can do the job, even though you did exaggerate your resume.'