Ethical Capitalist T-Shirts

'They're not our 'profits,' Mike. We like to think of them as the organic by-products of non-toxic capitalism!'

"And once we wipe out the disease, where does that leave us?"

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"Cash, Jordan. That's what separates man from the apes."

The man who invented the wheel/The man who patented the wheel.

Big business is not evil

"To mediate properly, you need a mantra. How about 'Ka-Ching'?"

"It would appear they worshipped the almighty dollar."

'Great, and I'll also need some mirrors.'

'I'm not authorized to talk about that...I'll have to patch you through to our department of unspeakable evil.'

"I, too, hate being a greedy bastard, but we have a responsibility to our shareholders."

'Still, there's a lot of money to be made.'

Ethics (with an eye on the bottom line) committee.

"Do you want to ruin me?! Take it away!!"

The scales between gluttony and hunger

Crisis of values

'There's a no-nonsense quality about TJ that I admire.'

"I suppose it's too late to start testing on animals?"

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

Nasty, Shady, and Gruesome equal Massive potential profits

"On the one hand, we'll burn in hell; on the other, that's a lot of money."

'That's it agreed then - the company's new motto is going to be 'We didn't do anything illegal'.'

Large cap funds

"You can take it with you down here - but no social conscience funds."

Amputee watches wealthy man who has a spare set of legs.

CEO slumber

GDP

'Do you realise Jenkins, that I started this company without a penny to my name? Well, unless you count that measley couple of million my father left me. '

'The Rich Get Richer - The Poor Get Poorer'

bag of money as a bicep

"For the profits of which we are about to partake, we give thanks. Amen."

"Johnson's selling ad space in the tunnel of light."

'Your business plan needs work, I'm not feeling a tingle of moral remorse.'

'Expensive? Yes, but I don't exploit my mother.'

HB Fillmond - A great entrepreneur and capitalist/CD Hainsmore - Always knew who to hitch his wagon to...