Ethereal Entertainer T-Shirts

"Not funny."

Magazine Stand at the Pearly Gates

Eagle (The Divine Comedy).

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

An amplified harp

'Honey. . . I'm ommmmmmmmmmmmmmm.'

'Anything good on tonight?'

'I've been to seventh heaven many times, but this is my first experience with the real thing.'

"I hate his 'holier than thou' attitude."

Angels' Band: Balloons holding up a guitar.

"I was in purgatory only briefly and they've been sending me email newsletters ever since."

'I miss the evildoers.'

"It's very nice. I just think they could add a spa."

"It was bad enough learning to master the use of wings here but roller-blades must have been a nightmare!"

'I thought everybody would be equal here'

Man turns into an angel.

Frontispiece to 'A Book of Bargains' by V O'Sullivan- Depicts an Apparition from one of the Stories

For one embarrassing week, heaven ran out of normal wings,

I just figured moths would have their own heaven.

I agree it's kind of sad...but it was just a matter of time.

"It's time to pull the plug."

"I was very relieved. I expected to spend eternity on hold."

Heaven II

"Shadow figures on laundry day"

'I'm happy for eternity, but I still miss happy hour.'

Listen, I know you're omniscient - You don't need to say "spoiler alert" every time you tell me something.

"Well, well, well... We meet again at last!"

'I managed to take it with me but it seems to be useless here."

Angel playing disk golf with his halo

"And of course it comes with an after lifetime guarantee."

No caption. (Two angels play basketball in heaven. Halo of one forms rim of basketball hoop.)

And that guy...HE invented the hamburger!

'The bathroom? It's that cumulonimbus, the third cloud on the right.'

"Texting and driving?"

"It's just a little death defect."