Entertainment Gadabout Pillows

'Satellite TV? You're spoiling that kid.'

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

They hated me.

Showbiz Awards

Benedict Cumberbatch

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

A Guide to Balloon Animals

Champagne

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

The Rooster Comedian.

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

Television Readers.

Cow Show Tunes

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"Bloody hell!"

'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'

Cord cutter

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

"The following film has been formatted to fir the screen of the newer and more expensive television set."

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

End the Winter Blues