Entering Adolescence Gifts

Adolescence is Coming!

'I heard that as soon as we become aware of our sexual impulses, whatever they are, we'll have to hide them.'

"And up ahead - that's puberty."

"He likes it."

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"Young man, go to your room and stay there until your cerebral cortex matures."

"I don't know why I worry...Baldo's just a normal boy. It's good to see him maturing...making friends...with nice girls...exploring new feelings...and desires.... You have to go home now."

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

'Isn't it time you started thinking about cars instead of horsie rides?'

"Allowance?! Yeah, if you take out the trash, I'll allow you to keep living here."

"Well, I've come this close to asking out Sylvia Sanchez. But I'm just an average guy! Nothing about me says 'I'm cool! Look at me!'"

"Having a cat will prepare us for having a teenager one day."

"Wings will be cool, I guess, but I'm mostly hoping the braces and pimples fall off."

Teenage Angst.

'Beware of the teenager.'

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

'We've created a teenager!'

"My name is Van Gelsing, Madame. I'm an expert in cleaning teenagers' rooms. If you need me, just give me a call, okay?"

The end of innocence

Pubertry

"I don't know...but it seems like nothing ever changes around here. It's like we've been 15 years old forever!"

'Not till you're sixteen.'

I'd like to request a transfer to a household offering a higher allowance and fewer choices.

"You just wait tilll your father gets home!!"

Ringtones Kids Can't Hear.

"Maybe if your creativity had fewer outlets, it would come out of you with more force."

'That was quite a birthday party - we played full-contact spin-the-bottle.'

"Oh come now, darling. When I was your age, I felt different, too."

'And where have you been all day young lady? Your mother and I have been worried sick!'

"All this running around you do at night … it’s killing your mother."

"Of course, you've always set a good example for me ... that's why you embarrass me so much."

'… and another thing … the only reason you know it's my birthday to begin with, is because we were all born on the same day!'