Enid Blyton Enthusiast Pillows

'What's wrong with him, doctor? He's read dozens of Enid Blyton books and he still isn't racist.'

Turn, turn and turn.

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

"Homosapius amorius... the common lovebirds."

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

"Can't we ride off in another direction?"

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

The Not So Wild West

'I don't know about you, Clyde, but I'm getting a mighty uneasy feeling we could be riding straight into an ambush interview!'

"If he doesn't go nuts first, he'll be the first person to ever write a novel on a cell phone."

Civil Howdy Pardnership

'Can we skip to the part where I charge with a light saber?'

Jasper's Limo Service.

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

Cowboy

'You're too aggressive.'

"An accountant? No son of mine is going to be an accountant! You'll be an octopus wrangler like your old man, and like it!"

"What's the problem Cowboy? Never heard of Cattle Driving before?"

Daisy had the fastest udders in the west field.

'It's Colonel Bowie, Davy... he cut himself again.'

"Not tonight, hon—I've got a heartache."

'It counts as one of your five portions a day.'

A cowboy uses a noose for a clothesline.

"Goodbye, masked consultant. And thanks for reducing our inefficiencies."

"How's your lowrider blog going?"

I'm looking at photos of potential dates here. Your "screening" process.

"Next Christmas, I drive the cattle, you go see Mom."

'Don't think of sweeping as a chore. Consider it practice for the Olympic Curling Team.'

I'm Ok, You're Ok Corral