English Language Enthusiast Gifts

"Okay, okay. 'Canine.' That's 'K-N-i-N-E.' Oh rats!"

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

Wordplay: In The Bag.

'Whoooa,MAN,check out this STORM! It's PELTING down!'

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

'Stick them up...'

"It lost a little something in translation."

Henry the amazing talking dog.

'This is the fun part...waiting to find out just what we've ordered.

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

We Will Beat Any Genuine Quote...

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

"Oui, c'est bon. It is, how you Americans say, 'Magically Delicious'."

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

Staff Yearbook

Say it with flowers - available in any language.

His Hers Pers Vis Xyrs Hirs TBD

'Do it write the first time.'

'To them, capital punishment means making them use proper capitalization.'

Dyslexia is no longer a disorder...

'That's not what I meant by 'IV'.'

'Give it to me straight, Doc... is it pronounceable?'

'Now what? Everything I can pronounce is OFF!'