Engagement Humor Fan Pillows

'Your fiance had a business meeting she couldn't miss. I'm a temp.'

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Life is for the birds.

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"First date hairball... awkward."

The Brothers Grime

'Stop complaining woman, you wanted a boating holiday!'

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

Beer Parasol.

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

"I fell to the ground from a height of about two metres when I was born: My very first stunt!"

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

'Joe has been partying hard!'

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

"Well, you were late and her boyfriend didn't turn up for their wedding, so....."

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

"Open a wine that will make me want to watch the shows you want to watch."

"It's Doris Kearns Goodwin. Is there anything we'd like to know about the Presidency?"

"You don't sniff my butt anymore."

'I knew you would come crawling back.'

'Bob, wait!!! Nice try, bear.'

"This merger is not producing the expected synergies."

'All she said was something about having rice for dinner and then poof!. . . She's gone!'

"Fish finder."