Endurance Lover Gifts

"Oh, we have a special hell for triathletes. It's just like regular life, except you can't talk about your triathlons."

'My feet are killing me.'

"Portrait of a Lady"

37 years in the same position.

The Runaway Horse

"They're comfortable."

Fight or Flight

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

A boy acting suspiciously

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

"Trail mix?"

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

Humpty Dumpty goes bungee jumping.

"And then on ab day they roll on their backs, flail, and mimic us in the throes of death."

Rollercoaster opens when it is still being built.

'I count only four parachutes. Where's Mr. Simms?'

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

'Remember last Saturday. . . you were bold that day. No dear, caught.'

Zoo animals.

Thug life on safari.

"Caught another one!" "Let's eat!"

"WOW...this new bike has great acceleration!"

"Look—you can't say we don't give them fair warning!"

'Swiss Army Rescue Service. How can we help?'

The circus diver.

'HEY! Shouldn't that be a reef-knot?!'

Migrating cows.