Encyclopedia Lover Pillows

Centipedia.

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

"Bed Spread"

Eldrow

"Useless information"

"Your vocabulary is enlarged."

Library door sign says, 'We have encyclopedias ... the original Facebook!'

Wordplay: Export.

I think you'll find that I'm easily encouraged. For instance, the fact that the two exclamation points above your head are tempered by one question mark gives me great hope. !?!

In an unprecedented occurrence, Noah Webster fails his vocabulary test.

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

'Do you always have to shout? Well? Do you? Huh?'

'Diver caught scallops - is that a description of what happened or a compound adjective'

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

'Sometimes, from time to time, occasionally I wish I'd never bought that ruddy thesaurus!'

Irritable Vowel Syndrome: "EEEIIIOOOAAA AUUUEEE!!"

The Oxford Comma Coin

Wordplay: Nonstarter.

Trivia/Great Literature.

"Dinosaurs are cool!"

"Remember that '70s TV show 'What's Happening'!? Did they ever come up with an answer?" "I don't know, but it makes me wonder if Marvin Gaye found out what's going on." "The black hole of cannabis-induced queries"

Harmon Silas, calculating the thousand words his picture is worth, wonders what do do with contractions.

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

A planet like ours - pub quiz dolphin

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"We call it 'learning to read', not 'battling illiteracy'."

"Not that kind of hare, Rapunzel!"

'Well? - Now that we've learned to talk, aren't you going to admit that you were wrong?'

"I'm sorry-his I.Q. is actually on the charts."

Sign on Roget's Thesaurus, Inc.: 'Absent Ingesting Comestibles'

'Yes, I speak perfect English, I have to 'cause you English are too bloody lazy to learn French!'

'Yes, sure, certainly, you bet, of course, yeah, right, yep....'

"I think our daughter should change her major. She can now ask for money in 3 different languages!"