Emotionally In-tune Viewer Gifts

'Let me guess, more dust in your eyes?'

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

'There's nothing on.'

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

Turmoil change.

Triceratops watching television with satellite dish made from own horns.

"Oh, O.K. I can sort of see it."

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

"Would it kill you to ask me how I'm doing once and a while?"

"This is Sally Whitgart on TV -- We now switch you to Bart Fribledale on the Internet...."

Masochistic Soccer Fan

350-million-miles from earth but now right in our living rooms.

Woman on TV says: 'Remember, you can download the best bits of this show as a video podcast, if you really have no life.'

"I've been reformatted for television."

"Have you read all these?"

'We now come to the end (sob!) of our programming day....'

'It was working perfectly until his team lost 15-0'.

"It's weird how you can see a face in just about anything if you're looking for it."

'Why do I need to DVR this show when they play it over and over again?'

For 43 years, Hank had successfully stuffed every feeling he'd ever had, until,of course, the morning when Fred asked if he could borrow a paper clip.

Next advert in 2 seconds...

"Frank likes the Happy News show on the Nostalgia Channel. It plays fake news reels of the Good Old Days."

"The following programme is guaranteed to be pure fluff, with no social messages whatsoever."

'I always cry at the ending.'

"Looks like the BBC cutbacks are starting to kick in."

Good cop, sad cop.

The Happy Movie - Warning: This movie contains no death, murder,explosions,fighting or violence of any kind whatsoever. 'What do you think?'

'She's always like this when Wimbledon ends.'

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

'I remember when we used to have to watch one football game at a time.'

A family hides from the TV news.

They killed the monster!