Emotional Intelligence Seeker Pillows

Thin Tank and Emote Tank.

"C'mon, people. In group therapy we share."

'With this organ transplant, you may find yourself doing a lot of thinking with your heart,'

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

"But can't I be feared and loved?"

Large Emoticon Collider

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

The Book Lover

"It's nice to feel wanted though, isn't it?"

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

Two Rages Passing in the Night

"I learned one thing today. Attitude trumps aptitude!"

'My building inspector just doesn't understand me.'

The bluebird of passive-aggressiveness

Romance is more difficult for robots than it is for people. Sure, we can check for compatibility by comparing operating systems but until battery technology improves, all our relationships will be on-again, off-again. Worst of all, we can't handle passion. When the sparks are flying a romance blowup will follow.

"We added it just for the millenials."

"Real men cry these days....."

"You can't let the tick birds continue to define you."

A stairway leading into a heart leads out from the brain.

Unhappy clown.

"I know he's little, but he uses it."

"I'd like to see you every Tuesday, forever."

'Don't act too happy that school's out. You'll hurt our teacher's feelings.'

'Look, I know I'm just the bread, but I feel like you guys aren't being emotionally honest with each other and it's going to cause problems down the road.'

"If your emotional intelligence is so high, why do you always forget our anniversary?"

"I'm sorry I lost my temper last night. I've just been on edge since we met."

"When you say you love your life, should I be happy for you?"

"Seasonal depression and existential depression and political depression for the trifecta."

Just one of the many ways self-help books can improve people's lives.

"So, I said to the lion, 'You want proof laughter ensures emotional health?... Ever seen a hyena in therapy?!'"

“You must be this self aware and emotionally secure to go on this ride”

'Why do I get the feeling you're holding something back?'