Emergency Prepper Pillows

"Just two more outfits. . .Then I'll jump."

'Lower.No,lower. A way lower. - Under the arms.Under the arms! Around his chest! OK listen...- Do you want to learn the Heimlich manoeuvre or not?!!!'

This has been a test. If this had been an actual emergency - you'd be dead. (radio warning broadcast)

'It's the plumber ... '

'I keep them around for unruly octopi, or giant radioactive spiders... you know, just in case.'

"That's it. I'm calling animal control."

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

California: In Case of Fire Break Glass and Dial A Prayer.

In case of fire call yourself.

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

Fire Assembly Point

Break Glass In Case of Emergency: Adult Diapers

Emergency Fire Blanket

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'This is a test of the emergency broadcast system. This only a test.'

"Terrorism, plagues, financial collapse. Ferguson keeps us ready for anything!"

What's your contingency plan, Randy? My what? If a calamity of biblical proportions were to strike here in Canardville, would you flee across the bridge to Candorville? Or would you search in vain for a fallout-resistant bunker, before surrendering to the cruel inevitability of your demise? I ask just for the sake of discussion. No reason to panic. Totally unrelated: I just found out someone who's definitely not me is selling fallout bunkers at buy-this-now-if-you-want-to-live.com. Very bad man.

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

Emergency Phone.

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

Emergency exit into Space

A sun opens its mouth to eat a burning Earth

Zombie Problems

"Siri, find an ICU near me."

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

The End is Nigh

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

S.O.S. vaccine

Prepper Dog

'Relax. This is only a test.'

Holiday Gifts 2020

Disasters