Elevated Explorer T-Shirts

"Now this is how to enjoy the fall colours!"

'Oh my god, I may have to walk on the floor!'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

Outer Space Outsourcing

Alien David statue

"So, the Scharfs have an atoll. Big deal."

'Some of those youngsters have come up with a terrific new idea - feathers.'

"Look what I found, dad!"

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

"Houston, we have a problem."

'But what is the universe for?'

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

Ascent of Machine.

Man, my cat sneaks into the weirdest spots.

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

How we imagined A.I. in 1977. . . How it's looking today. . .

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

God Sneezes Out Creation

'Hey weirdo, where do you think you're going?'

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

"Would you relax? They never look up."

Alien Snowmen

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

October 11, 2009: History is made when 8-year-old Tommy Wurtner becomes the first child to enter space.

'If, as you say, they're so evolved, why do they need to wear clothes to survive?'

"My latest sighting turned out to be just another weather balloon."

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 1: Prologue

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'