Elephant Collector T-Shirts

GOP: NO

Loyal Seconds in the Republican Party

'The elephant man turned out to be just another Republican.'

Rose-colored glasses.

'Obama's letting all the progress we made in Iraq go right down the drain...He's trying to distract everybody...'

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Southwark Fair.

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

'Of course you're out of gas. You forgot to fill up at the last stop...maybe this will teach you to stop daydreaming.'

"Did you just do a rooster?"

Elephant ass selfie.

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

The First Printed Bible

Estate Sale! All the stuff my kids said they don't want to inherit.

Stone Age women were less happy than men at the arrival of the iron age: Look what I've invented just for you darling.

Dinner at the Jolly Sandboys (opening to Ch 19)

The circus diver.

'By Jove, we've finally found it! the fabled elephants' disco!'

'Peekaboo!'

"Man, these closed book exams suck! Who could possibly remember all this crap?"

'Yes, the baby should arrive soon: Her nesting instinct is in overdrive!'

Ye Old Cafe: No Coffee Today - Sore Arm!

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

Table Of The Elephants

Bob realised that he'd had his binoculars back to front.

"'Course I've seen one before...but never one that ate peanuts!"

"I thought you were getting me a dog?"

'You did remember the condoms didn't you?'

At last, Clarence thought, the long-awaited return to the old economy had begun.

'Jumbo waits for the tusk fairy'

"I was going to get a cat but they had an offer on."

Zoo warden attempting to impress woman visitor