Element Collector Gifts

Raining chemical elements.

Elements

Life's Rarest Things

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Well....I could've done this!"

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Jazz is Invented

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Six jazz instruments.

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

'Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know the drill.'

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"So, Bob... anything you'd like to tell me about your little trip to the hunting store on Boxing Day?"

Viola, cello, 1st violin and 2nd violin vending machine.

Tiny jazz musicians play large drum and bass.

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

The dead sea scrolls

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

Aberdeen Smoking the Pipe of Peace - Aberdeen and France at War with Russia

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

"The harmonica! Boy you're lucky, my cowboy plays the double-bass! I tell you what, it's a pretty awkward thing to carry around..."

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''

'Just one more and this puppy is headed for another bar.'

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."