Elder Care Focus Prints

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

"Careful."

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

Old woman with trolley full of medication.

"Someone to see you!"

'How do you feel when you get up in the morning?' 'Amazed!'

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

'Dwayne deeply regretted not placing his mother in a personal haircare home earlier.'

Gerontologist on the phone - 'Oh, you know ... same old, same old ... and how are things with you?'

Fetch the Walker

'Be assured about you mother's memory - we back up all the residents onto hard disk once a week.'

"Alright, Grandfather, let's check your ticker."

Caution Student Driver.

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

"Television repairs....Don't you want to see my identity?"

"For someone your age, the yearly premium on a $5,000 policy is $8,000."

'When you get older everything hurts... and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

How to save money on geriatric care?

"No, your body is actually alive and well back on earth - your mind has just arrived at the gates of blissful dementia."

"Mijo...get me some water...not cold, but not hot either...just kind of cold. Maybe with just one ice cube... But not in a glass. Put it in a cup and stir it with a spoon."

"Methuselah's been retired for over 800 years, but what is he retired from?"

Care Home Eject Button.

"My butt is loose!"

I'm not sure when I can help you. It's not easy getting parts for you anymore

Getting Old Sucks: "Incontinence hotline. Can you hold please?"