Ego Deflator Pillows

"You're about one-tenth as good as me. And I mean that as a compliment."

Professor Wiles grows insufferable.

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"It's his ego growth chart."

"I'm working on more of a 'personal' mythology."

'I think he would come back to earth if women would just stop kissing him.'

'What makes you think I want a trophy wife?'

'Whenever Mat gets a little over-confident, I tell him to try to fold a fitted bed sheet.'

Important Muscles.

"So what is the true need for this project?" "To make me look good."

'Nothing has come to my attention today and I want to know why.'

Hierarchy with 'Me' at the top.

Cat with Crown.

'I didn't choose art. Art chose me!'

"And how long till they start saying the 'Great' after my name."

I'm ego surfing right now, looking up my name on different search engines.

"Yes, a table for three: me, him and his ego."

'I think winning that last hand went to Bob's head, because he now has an entourage.'

'You'll like this, sir. Instead of the usual boring bio, this year I've done your creation myth.'

Pierre was full of himself.

"You know what they say...'The desk makes the man.'"

'Before we begin, let's say a little prayer for humility.'

Once entangled, clashing male doctors usually die a slow death by starvation.

"I hear you're something big in the city?"

'I have ego issues — at least, I think it's me.'

"On a personal note, my wife, Ann, and I have agreed to separate, as I've fallen in love with the sound of my own voice."

'Your ego seems to be your primary problem.'

'And what a horrible little package.'

"Fake."

'In my humble opinion... wait, did I just say that?'

"I actually don't have anything to say, but I missed the sound of my own voice."

"Since the promotion, my husband has gotten a big head."

Psychiatry. Whenever I go on an ego trip, my superego won't let me have any fun.

'Ms. Sims, do a Google search. Find out how many CEO's have more Google citations than me.'

'Our rivals have issued a big profit warning, so we'll issue an even bigger warning.'