Eggcellence Seeker Gifts

Diner. 2 Eggs any style $2.50. Easter!

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'Please put that confusing mess of documents, files and folders where it belongs...in your computer.'

Baroque Peacock

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Kissing the Blarney Stone.

'Come on, Walter, you're wasting out time! Stop using complete sentences!'

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

'See here, Flanigan ? what's this I hear about you going over my head to the computer?'

Ornithologist

Humpty's Mother watches her biological clock...

"Anybody see where I laid... my... my... you monsters."

'This isn't the meeting. This is the pre-premeeting to talk about when to meet and plan the meeting.'

'Who said you could come out of your room?'

The bad egg.

"Congratulations, it looks like half a dozen."

'Your brains are scrambled.'

"Sherlock Combs there said he believes it's an inside job."

'All my children have been successful. Frank here is in the Oval Office.'

"Hey, it's me. I just sent you a text message responding to your e-mail saying that I should IM you."

"You'll get right back over here if you know what's good for you!"

The new electronic system is efficient, but the garage had to sacrifice parking spaces for it.

Egg!

'I wish I had more hair.' 'Don't be a silly billy. You've got plenty of hair. Here's your bald, I mean your boiled, egg.'

Man domesticates the chicken (centuries later, eggs were found to be edible).

'Good news, Perkins! We're finally getting an automatic postage machine!'

"Half a dozen brown—three large, three jumbo!"

'Ouch! I'm glad I didn't lay him.'

Meet the layer.

"It's so warm that I'm laying hard boiled eggs."

"Eggs, eggs, eggs...that Delia Smith's ruining my life."

I don't consider it "multitasking" when you have to do the same task over and over to get it right!

"What about laying long-range eggs for protest rallies?"