Efficiency Seeker Gifts

'This isn't the meeting. This is the pre-premeeting to talk about when to meet and plan the meeting.'

'...and we will continue to have these meetings until I learn why no work is getting done!'

Manual automation in the office.

'Please put that confusing mess of documents, files and folders where it belongs...in your computer.'

'You'd get a lot more work done if you didn't reply to every spam email with 'Thank you for your kind offer ...''

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

'Come on, Walter, you're wasting out time! Stop using complete sentences!'

'See here, Flanigan ? what's this I hear about you going over my head to the computer?'

'Good news, Perkins! We're finally getting an automatic postage machine!'

'We're down here to see how other company departments including shipping function.'

We're sorry, all lines are currently busy. Please continue holding for the next available recorded message.

"These computers are awesome! Mr. Rod says this new system should cut our workload by 50 percent."

'It will save time if you just tell me that works and what doesn't.'

'Science proves that some people are in fact a complete waste of time and space.'

'We did consider furniture, but this way is just so much easier to vacuum.'

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

'You say that this gadget will cut my work by half? In that case, I'll take two!'

"I realized how much time I was wasting chewing my cud, so to get more free time, I bought myself a blender..."

"I need to do a time management course but I've only got 12 minutes."

"I think this department may have something to do with your company's productivity problems."

Screen Limits

"I'm so much more efficient at my job. I used to waste hours shredding resumes. Now I insist they be sent online and I can delete them in under a minute."

Uses of computers

The new electronic system is efficient, but the garage had to sacrifice parking spaces for it.

Pointless, No win situation.

...I see you've programmed it to straighten paper clips.

I don't consider it "multitasking" when you have to do the same task over and over to get it right!

"It would be faster for you to do this online."

"Hey, it's me. I just sent you a text message responding to your e-mail saying that I should IM you."

"Looks like we found the issue."

Where your mind & battle are los

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

Colour Version: Living by the Clock