Educational Content Advocate Pillows

Warning to kids

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'What does it say, Dad?'

I'm over-educated and under-employed. That's why there's no MIDDLE class anymore.

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

About the curriculum. The contemporary novel from Austen to Dickens...

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

Staff Yearbook

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"An educational toy is my immediate goal, but my long range plan is to get him on Jeapordy!"

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'I got and 'E' in spelling.' - 'That is an 'F'.'

The Church of DanaeDanaeism: 'And let such sacrilege go uncontested? Never! I demand equal time for alternate explanations of things.'

'Relax, dad, I haven't been in a classroom for months because all my college classes are online!'

'If school is so important, why isn't it on television?'

Nurse's introduction training - "We don't get the quality of student we used to"

'LOVELY school. But where's the library?' 'What's a library?'

"No, Einstein's theory of relativity isn't, 'don't marry your cousin.'"

"Did you ask for the large print edition?"

'So feared her prince may turn back into a frog so she went to college and earned a degree in finance, just in case.'

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

Gold versus Knowledge

'It may not be a great report card but it beat the street expectations.'

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

"I'd say hi to my favorite teacher, but I think she's enjoying some quiet remote-from-us learning."