Edible Entertainer Gifts

"Ninja bread men"

"Even the waiters here are organic."

"Extreme miming"

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

'Fancy us all being afraid of wasps when there's a WHOLE nest of 'em in my drinks cabinet!'

Glyndebourne

"Made with a little extra TLC – and THC for good measure."

"This tea isn't helping – I'm taking a gummy."

"I'm putting you on country music."

Roller Coasters

"Would you mind telling me why you keep hitting a scary-music sound bite every time you pick up your steak knife?"

Candy Corn Dracula

'The ‘class clown' thing is my fault. I totally misjudged the crowd.'

Artist and chiken

'He's judging our reserve pinot noir - five years to produce it, five seconds in his mouth.'

"Blueberry muffins. My wife made them."

*Not suitable for those with an allergy to consciousness expansion

"Don't worry. These rosés are still fresh."

You still working on that?

'Mom's in the bedroom trying on scenarios.'

David Letterman

"I used to come here to browse. Now I graze."

The 60 Hour Gourmet Recipe For People Who Have Time To Spare And Then Some.

"I thought it was time to throw out the pizza boxes. What's amazing is it's just from the weekend."

Do you do portraits as well?

"Just so you guys know, in the event of an emergency I'm fully trained in P.R."

"Wild rice Krispy treat."

Tuscan Fare Of The Moment

'Solar heat is fine, but I miss our privacy!'

Apples and oranges

'Well if you're bored go for a swim, or climb up a tree, or...or...do one of those two things.'

"Your story would have been better at 2x speed."

For twenty years Harold had been a devoted vegetarian, but then one day...

Musical Cook

Knock that back please, I'm cleaning the crystal.