Economic Joke Enthusiast Pillows

'Usually, they try to break out, but, because of the bad economy and the need to eat and have a place to stay, they try to break in.'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

'This financial report is frightening. Who wrote it, Stephen King?"

"While we're on the subject of earnings, does anyone have a clever metaphor using the word, 'toilet'?"

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

Trickledown economics

2nd bailout for Greece by EU.

"Good to see they're trying to keep the high street vibe."

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'Steady...here he comes...wait for it, wait for it...'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

'Greece is up for auction on eBay - and there's no bidders.'

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'We buy and sell them.'

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

Government Handouts.

Blame the Victims

'He's known for his pessimistic prognostications on the stock market.'

Inflating assets to get a loan. Too poor to pay taxes

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

"We'll double our chances of recovery if we buy two lottery tickets."

Transparency and big business.

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

"These days, many people can only afford to drink from home."

"I suggest we move the decimal two points to the left and call it 'budget deficit reform.'"

It's a nice apartment but I don't want to pay my share of the national debt for rent.

Office of Management & Budget. Now hiring: crowdfunding expert to reduce the U.S. budget deficit.

'Sorry about the mess -- I've been slashing the Federal budget.'

Leprechaun finds EU bail out at the end of a rainbow.