Economic Crisis Navigator Gifts

"The dealer will allow me to return the limo if my investments go bad."

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

Wall Street Couch

Slipping and sliding down the slope...

'Crisis'

'This is our Greek debt, this is our Spanish debt, and this is our Portuguese debt...'

Economic Downturns

'I've been sent by the board to ask if you'd be willing to cut your symbolic one dollar a year salary to fifty cents.'

'You can't fire me! I'm too big to fail!'

"This just in! Due to downsizing, the mega-merger of Consolidated Industries and Humungous Corporation has been changed to a simple bankruptcy."

2nd bailout for Greece by EU.

'Our company has hit an icebery and is sinking fast. Of course, it's all very symbolic.'

'With the economy the way it is, there's no silver lining. In fact we sold that last week!'

Try not to worry.

Capitalism.

"Get me someone in Apologies, someone in Walkbacks, and send up the whole Scapegoating team."

The Covid Tail

"Well, the first reactions to the terrible truth are anger and sadness, but now it's time to act like men!"

"Your job will be to make these results look Stellar."

Ruble in Trouble

'We don't have a mission statement. We have a survival plan.'

Coronavirus and Atlas

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

"It's official, Michael has filed for moral bankruptcy."

We need bold action to raise morale, yet not make people think there's a problem.

"I negotiated. He's going to let us suffocate in our own ennui!"

'Congratulations. Your old bloated 401K is now valued as a lean, mean 199F!'

"J.P. will be joining you by speakerphone."

'Tell the staff the company has hit a symbolic iceberg and is slowly sinking.'

"Son, it’s time we had the ‘your mother and me got fleeced by Wall Street and you’ll have to support us’ talk."

End of crisis

'I warned them! I told them the sky is falling! The sky is falling! But, this time nobody listened.'

"Economists, and these days we're missing more and more of the poor souls."