Eco-exploiter Gifts

'...and I want a tax rebate for the plastic carrier bags.'

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"I love you too, big guy."

God's Subcontractors

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

"I envy you, but my dietary requirements make it difficult for me to travel..."

"It says here that people can't live without soil. I knew it!"

There is No Planet C

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

"I think we have run out of time..."

'Broccoli is biodegradable, you know, in case you want to throw it out before I eat it.'

Climate Change

"If we do hire you, will you promise to bring a bag lunch and dispose of the bag in the proper receptacle?"

'That morning, nature got to work early...'

Meanwhile, back on planet earth...Greenland's ice sheet is melting faster than previously thought, sea levels could rise..."

"I solve mathematical problems, program electronic music, analyze environmental issues...but being a renaissance man isn't what it used to be."

"I can’t remember the last time he hugged me!"

'I was dumped by my girlfriend.'

'There is nobody else. I'm afraid we've wiped out all of the other species.'

Ecological balance.

Snowman has twisted, wonky carrot nose: 'Apparently, it's organic.'

'Yes you have to work Earth Day.'

"Earthworms are good guys, and birds are good guys—that's just life, honey."

'He's made an eco-friendly bamboo bike... unfortunately all the tomato plants have fallen down.'

'I forgot how creepy you look in the dark.'

"There's a big green giant at the door!"

GM Crops Genie.

'Sure I care about the ozone and the environment. But what can I do? I'm just a bump on a log?'

'One of the good things about being a dung beetle is that my kids are not fussy eaters...'