Eco-exploiter Gifts

'...and I want a tax rebate for the plastic carrier bags.'

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"I love you too, big guy."

God's Subcontractors

"I envy you, but my dietary requirements make it difficult for me to travel..."

"Looks like those folks from 'civilization' are back!"

The eco club is starting a locavore movement here at school. "Loco" what? Eating fresh food, grown locally. So? So everyone eats healthier and uses less energy. Um � Ok. I'll tell my mom. Who are those people. Locobores.

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

"It says here that people can't live without soil. I knew it!"

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

There is No Planet C

"I think we have run out of time..."

'Broccoli is biodegradable, you know, in case you want to throw it out before I eat it.'

Climate Change

"If we do hire you, will you promise to bring a bag lunch and dispose of the bag in the proper receptacle?"

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

'That morning, nature got to work early...'

'I was dumped by my girlfriend.'

Plant Parenthood...

Look! There's a photo of our eco club's Earth Day actions in the newspaper! Sports. Power up the green machine!! I could use more copies. Me too. They're going to really power up my college applications.

"I solve mathematical problems, program electronic music, analyze environmental issues...but being a renaissance man isn't what it used to be."

"I can’t remember the last time he hugged me!"

Meanwhile, back on planet earth...Greenland's ice sheet is melting faster than previously thought, sea levels could rise..."

'There is nobody else. I'm afraid we've wiped out all of the other species.'

Ecological balance.

Snowman has twisted, wonky carrot nose: 'Apparently, it's organic.'

"Earthworms are good guys, and birds are good guys—that's just life, honey."

'Yes you have to work Earth Day.'

'One of the good things about being a dung beetle is that my kids are not fussy eaters...'

"There's a big green giant at the door!"

'I forgot how creepy you look in the dark.'

If we build raised beds and a compost bin now

'Sure I care about the ozone and the environment. But what can I do? I'm just a bump on a log?'

GM Crops Genie.