Eclectic Cuisine T-Shirts

'Our cuisine has moved from the eclectic to the schizophrenic.'

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

Lockdown casserole

'How is the water prepared?'

'Do you want your zebra de la margola rare, medium or well done?'

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

'I would kill for a truffle.'

Lottery - come back to eat here 20 times and you will win million dollar in lottery.

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

'This is my kind of Chinese...A chocolate double fudge fortune cookie!'

'Oh, sure, it gets the creative juices going, but is it worth the cost?'

The Eclectic Chair

"As you can see, my culinary creations are eclectic."

"Our chef specializes in atomic gastronomy."

'Uh yeah, it's supposed to be like that... it's a... it's a new invention.'

"For this dish we'll need to sauté the onion with the week-old, moldy, ant-covered French fry over medium heat. Then, we lightly flash boil our dehydrated mouse..."

"In all my years of teaching I've never seen pizza dough spun into a triangle!"

Those who bought my cookbook with the transposed pages will get a refund. Those who actually enjoy Lobster Alfredo a la mode - bon app

Endangered Entrees

"Baldo, I don't like you eating that nasty food!"

"The special tonight is Steak Teriyaki, which is seared, cubed, and expertly tossed into your mouth.”

"That's one thing you can't get up here, a good hot curry."

'You think ideas are contained in food?'

'Do you do the squished up little balls that taste of fish - or are you the wrong ethnicity?'

"You'll like this place. The food is eclectic without being schizophrenic."

Hospital Food

'There's a new push to improve the quality of food available...here's the takeovut menus for Ling's Chinese and the Indian in the High St!'

"Hmmm, mountain oysters! Nutty flavor, with a hint of mutton!"

"Combination No. 5--no MSG."

"Hi! I haven't had a crap in months. Bon appetit!"

'Dear, what if tonight I add watercress, sorrel and purslane to our salad

Psychedelia Smith Cook Book.

'Tch! We're not eating Mexican again, are we?' 'Well, I'd look pretty silly going into an Italian restaurant dressed like this.'