Early Learner Enthusiast Pillows

'Timmy's very bright for his age. He knows nearly all his ABC's!'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

Super Student

"I'm still pre-literate."

A Preschool of Fish

Hanging off every word...

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

'Yes, grammar rules do evolve over time, but making up your own to 'stay ahead of the curve' won't work in this English class!'

First Word

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

Kindergarten. Today; Simon Says. I don't know who this "Simon Says" is, but he could make a killing in product endorsements!

'At first it's just kindergarten, but then mission creep takes over and you're in college.'

Education and Apprenticeships

"I can't believe it...school starts in two weeks!"

'Life isn't fair and neither is Miss Brown!'

"Fifty years in academia, studying, researching, writing and teaching. And what do they call me? ‘The Human AI’."

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

Abacus.

'Dad taught me how to tie my shoes, and I taught him how to program the computer.'

'Are you sure the children get plenty of exercise'

"Nice to have you all back at school, tap-tap, there are lessons to learn."

'I'm partially passing my Meteorology course.'

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

The History Teacher

Ethics ethics.

"Why don't you try learning from your own mistakes?"

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

'My parents didn't want me getting left behind in the system.'

History. The worst past is my dad says they're still making history!

I see we have the same summer reading list. ABC.

'Do your homework! - You gotta learn math if you want to be a bookie!'

'To better prepare you for the future, I've replaced the letters in your alphabet soup with Chinese ones.'

"For today's lesson, you're going to teach me about pronouns."