E=mc² Lover Pillows

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

"Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi!"

"I don't know what I'm going to do...my presentation is due on Monday and I haven't even started...I'm not sure I know how to speak."

"I love the equation that describes the slope of your nose."

"What am I, chopped liver?"

'You see, I didn't lie, the Internet is full of puppy and kitten videos: We could make a fortune!'

Recycled passion.

"As an astronomer, this discovery heralds a new golden age of academic fervor for mathematicians and astrophysicists across the globe. As a Sagittarius, I'm fucked."

Now Playing On Your Phone: Other People's Craft Projects....

'Talk about lack of trust! My trainer didn't even bet on me, but I showed him: I won the race!'

'She'd put 'The fear of God' into God himself!'

"We've proven, without a doubt, that as the Universe expands our butts look smaller."

Go Back to New York

'Tell us, in layman's terms, what your breakthrough means.'

'This is the last time I get a truck with a think tank.'

"He wasn't quite dark enough to name 'midnight' so I named him ten o'clock."

"If our proposal is a success, control yourself and don't start running all around the room."

"I used to think maybe I was the problem but then I realized she was just a bitch."

Godfrey Hunting for Lodgings

"This is what happens when you marry an obedience school dropout."

"it's not a new formula - he's testing new glasses."

'Nope. France is full up right now -- How'd you like to be an Albanian?'

"They gave me the Gaus Theorem, the Gauss Method for Quadratics, Gaussian distribution..."

"If you can't stand the jaguar, get out of the kitchen."

"Jack is becoming tough, adventurous, and independent. I put it down to my throwing him out with the bathwater."

'You'll find I'm very reasonable, Henderson- you scratch my belly and I'll scratch yours.'

"When I was your age, I had to ride fifteen miles on a little stationary bike while disco lights flashed and E.D.M. played in the background."

"They call this a coffee table, but it tastes nothing like coffee."

"Honey, for the last time, stop calling me at work."