Dual-theme Reader T-Shirts

Sex and violence/hell and brimstone.

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

Audio Books

'A is for Arse.'

Pirates: "To absent Limbs."

Examination.

"Javert" Would Like To Use Your Current Location

"Speed reader...?"

"I dropped my goblet!"

"Phew! - You've got bat breath."

"It's Shakespeare, Mother - please do't keep moaning 'Oh get on with it'!"

The Bride of Frankenstein

'Oh great,,, More protesters getting on our case about how the magazine industry creates 'unrealistic standards' for the human body,'

Frankenstein discovers that his bide may have been unfaithful.

"Can you test for broccoli and brussels sprouts too?"

"Prepare yourself for a shock. The birth records reveal you have a twin brother."

"You're a surprisingly good kisser for having two different dead guys' lips."

'What's a cubic foot?' - 'Whatever it is claim compensation.'

Bib's E-Book Readers.

'When I said we should read together I meant separate books.'

"It's not that I don't want a baby brother - it's just that this is a bad time for me developmentally."

"You've reached Randy, the Dating Doctor. What ails you?...."

'Does this book come with director commentary.'

"We no longer shelve gay fiction separately. It's been assimilated."

Aristophanes

'Well, how many pints do you weigh?'

Down with leather bookbinding. Read paperbacks.

'You stop buying books and I'll stop buying plants.'

Blood Bank - "Got any spare blood?"

"Yes, I tried tapping on the glass."

' 'Fairy Tales' by Hans Multifaith Andersen.'