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Insensitive Driving School

'If you're teaching him how to drive, what are you doing back there?'

'Was that a red light? You should know that it is highly unethical to take liberties just because the instructor is drunk...'

'After we return the purse, let's practice the signal for a left turn again.'

I'd prefer to do my test on foot.

How's my tailgating? 1-800-555-2200.

"And remember, the hand position on the steering wheel is 10 & 2, 9 & 3, 8 & 4."

'You seem to meet all the qualifications, but I'll still need to see you parallel park.'

Warning: Not responsible for anything in my life over the last 30 years.

'The penguin is upset...'

New driving hazards perception test....'I've crashed the computer.'

'Are we nearly there yet?'

Micro Psychiatry Clinic. You have a full schedule today, Doctor. The helium atom will be here to work on his fear of heights. The white blood cell with a germ phobia and amoeba with separation anxiety are coming in. The DNA molecule will be here about an identity crisis. And here, in the sports car, comes a new patient, a carbon-14 isotope. Ah, looks like he's going through a half-life crisis!

Sailor in Car.

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

'Lover's lance isn't the same as it used to be!'

"Maybe I'm aiming too high...maybe 'saving for a cool car' is too hard."

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"I'm not old enough to drive yet, but mom says this is good practice."

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

Caution (arrow falling from sky sign)

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

Actual Extent Of Doug's Off - Road Adventures (Touching the kerb)

Man helping a mini learner driver

Penguin Remote

"Perfect."

'Oh - go get yourself a porsche.'

Dog wiping windscreen with tail

I love my motor.

"Oh look, that police car is chasing someone! Let me get out of his way. Hmm...he's still behind me. Let me move... That's odd....he's still behind me. I'll move over another lane."

Look, Oog and Whonk just invented the intersection.

'I'm OK, but the car is in 'intensive care'!'

'Your car's ready, but drive carefully for awhile. I had to give the student an 'F' for the work he did on it.'

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'