Drinks Menu Explorer Prints

"I believe you'll like our company. We pay our employees time and a fifth."

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

Low-Energy Drinks

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

"She'll have a Shirley Temple, and I'll have a Shirley Temple's mother."

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'Ooo! The dog food sounds good! ... mind you, I always have that at home.'

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"Well I wouldn't eat it, but don't let that put you off."

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

"Anything but milk and cookies."

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

Coffee Menu

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

Coffee

'Whatever he's eating.'

'The customer is always right...'

Pizza with Extra Extra Cheese.

'Hard or soft science?'

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

'Cook is a musician. Improvises. Never makes the same thing twice.'

Heart Disease Menu

What's your most popular drink? Why do you want to know? Why base your order on what other people are buying? Don't be a follower. Be your own man. If you're unfamiliar with a drink, ask what's in it and decide for yourself whether that sounds good. Or better yet, live a little. Take a risk. Choose a drink you've never had at random and see where it takes you. You only have one life. Don't live it following in the footsteps of other people. That's kind of harsh. No, it's the name of the drink.

California Beverages Map

Complaints Desk

"You want organic, we'll make it organic."