Drill Instructors Pillows

A Verbal Difficulty

Military Drill

'Welcome to boot camp. You'll be staying in hut two-three-four.'

Guess who's going to be a sergeant major when he grows up?

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

"So, how was your day at work, Dear?"

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

"Looks like your rock cakes are a big hit this year, dear...."

"911, what is your major malfunction?"

'He's a retired Drill-Sergeant!'

"Lemming Boot Camp"

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

Dentist Training School.

A yeoman misunderstanding an order from his drill-sergeant

"I've never liked 'im - he's an attention seeker!"

"You guys need to #@%!% fight harder. You're all #@%!% wimps! You call yourselves a #@%!% army? Bull%#!*!"

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

"Bullets seem like overkill. What if I shot him with staples?"

"I'm using a silencer!"

'I keep yelling at my privates.'

'Being a Drill Sergeant isn't s tough - all you got to know is how to count to four.'

'Sir, we've drilled so deep this time that we've reached Arab oil.'

"Cruz! Are you eyeballin’ me? Eyes shut during savasana! You hear me? Lance, get up and give me 10 headstand pushups to help Cruz here shut her eyes."

TV Repair 101.

"You like woodwork class then, son?"

'I heard you mom is really strict.'

Adult School. You're teaching the history of animated cartoons? What did you teach tonight? I taught "I taw a puddy tat."

Passages in the Life of a Volunteer

'Hup, two, three, four! Hup, two, three, four!'

"Is something funny, soldier?"

Military ardour.

"Imagine an accident at 60mph..." "It would be like being hit by a 60 ton elephant."

Oil Workers

"I can't heeear you!"

'Completed the pyramid, eh? Now take it down to the ground.'