Door Decor Critic T-Shirts

"The sign's superfluous. That door's locked and bolted."

Postman's Knock.

"The knights of the round accent table"

'...Couldn't you just get pictures for your desk?'

'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Macho man body building club.

"At least you have taste when it comes to your computer's wallpaper."

Reason # 23 that doors don't make perfect seal against winter winds: Mischievous unemployed elves.

Cover Design for the Savoy (No. 2)

"You rang?"

'...And this property has wall to wall gravel...'

'Today's lesson - how to slam a door.'

The Great Out-doors

"We've decided to express our concern for the environment by redecorating."

'I forgot to close the door?...Seriously? Who puts a door on a hole?'

At death's door

"Okay, take in the new Persian carpets and the mahogany furniture and if you need more space throw out the big plants and this ugly old thing."

"Let's explore why you detest my throw pillows."

Evolving Door.

'It's hard to have confidence in a doctor whose office plants don't look very healthy.'

Beware of Static Electricity

'Poor Oog -- he invented the door, and locked himself out of his cave.'

Man sat on egg-timer toilet

'You know I don't like saltboxes!'

X-Ray toilets.

When bargain hunters crack.

Bob's Apartment

'I'm not so confident in this doctor. Did you notice that his plants don't look so healthy?'

"I like looking at amateur porn, because I like seeing other people's apartments."

'Bathrooms. I'm returning it. It's too tight.'

Aspirin company - Door pushes in and turns.

It's A Footstool! It's A Hassock!!It's... OTTOMAN!!!

The best way to teach the cat how to read?

"I remember when walls weren't so bossy."

welcome / Good riddance: "Over here. That's the back door."