Doomscroller Mugs

How To Deal With The Upcoming Recession, Inflation, Depression, Ice Age, Greenhouse Effect, Energy Crunch, Population Explosion, and Complete End of the World in the Year 2000.

Businessman in suit on beach with financial report and eyes cut out viewing impending storm.

'The economy can't be all that bad. That shop that sells guns and gold bullion has a line out the door.'

A Second Stimulus is Coming,

World Ends Today - Sorry About the Inconvenience.

"Hi. My name's Kevin. And I'm a newsaholic. It's been twelve hours since my last doomscroll..."

Recession tip: think positive!

'Are you sure you want to watch this?'

'Stocks dropped today, proving once again that life sucks.'

Mobile addiction

Bad News

"I'm bored."

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

'OK, so I fumbled. Now can you cure it or not?'

'It was a real scroller. I couldn't put down my screen.'

'It would never work out, Blackfire — our alignments are too different.'

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

Essex computer.

Witch dice.

Beware of stimulus plans.

"Sometimes we all feel like we've been tossed. You just have to roll with it."

The End of the World is Nigh - man with placard

"Today I'm going to search and scroll and swipe and binge."

50% looking at phone, 50% looking for phone

There were times when Ralph wished god didn't move in such mysterious ways.

'You're not interrupting anything...the four of us are just sitting around before dinner...Barbara, me and our two phones.'

Monolithopoly.

"I have to get this project finished."

"If I admit I'm bored with looking at my phone every minute of the day, will I be considered a traitor by my generation?"

Welcome to Las Vegas - Forefront of the great American luck ethic.

"Can Ethan come out to swipe and scroll?"

"Wanna go scroll on our phones at the gym?"

"I was admitted to heaven, but they didn't have WIFI."

'Watch the news with the sound turned off. You're suffering from information overload.'