Domestic Scene Navigator Pillows

"Honey! Wake up. We heard a noise downstairs!"

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

"I'm so sorry that I screamed...I had a terrible dream: the kids had to leave college and live with us again...Oh, Ed, it was horrible!"

Rowing machine on a river.

Base camp for Ed and Janet Wilson's courageous attempt to scale Mt. Blended Family.

"It's funny how that works. It doesn't matter where I am in the house... I can always tell when the novel isn't going well."

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

Working from home.

Working from Home with Kids

"I tried working at home, but my wife didn't like me performing colonoscopies in the dining room."

'Dear, would it be all right if I was assertive for a minute?'

'Explain to us, son, how gaining nine A levels is uncool and damages your street cred.'

'But enough about me... let's talk about you. Do you prefer plain or ribbed condoms?'

"Did he sleep through the night again?"

"Lift your stems."

"I really like smart women."

"Are we there yet?"

'Did you mess with the thermostat again?'

'Of course I love having you around. Before you were born, I was the only one your mother yelled at.'

"I'm just saying, it would have been nice to have an en suite at night."

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Housekeeping - No. III

"Found it! The cat was using it as a pillow."

Miss Manners: Inappropriate and Appropriate.

Give that woman a Pink Squirrel! Give that man a black eye.

"How do you work one of these?"

Sat Nav - Directions Through The House.

Productivity for those working in their pyjamas has plummeted with the viral increase in delivery can traffic across the pandemic...

A "balanced diet" means balancing what's left to cook with what's clean enough to cook it in.

"I warned you not to play snooker with Monty."

"Here comes those birds you pulled last night, stout and bitter."

"Go to work, I'll find out why Mom is agitated."

"I said, my testicles are cold." "That's because they're in the dog's water bowl again."

'He has weapons of mass destruction.'

"Mine's a large one!" "How I wish!"