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Working from home

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

Saint George and the Drag Queen

Moses' Tablet

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

TV jester.

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

Wordplay: In The Bag.

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

Cat Burglar

Falstaff

'Your fur looks like you slept in it.'

"Bill is in charge of our Ethics Department."

Hamlet

'No, Ben, making your eyes go bigger does not make the fish grow bigger!'

"See that stain? My wife did that, not me. All her, totally her fault."

New Flavors at Where's the Scoop Ice Cream

"Were we expecting a baby?"

"Another flue shot, Larry.

"What other tricks does he need?"

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"And remember, woman... I'm the one who wears the sassy pastel yellow toreador pants in the family!"

Cheating Death.

Storm in a magic lamp.

"Mulch madness"

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

One Painting Says To the Other... 'Do you ever get that creepy feeling like they are watching you.'

"I knew we agreed that you could be a stay-at-home dad, but that's when we decide to have children."

"You inviting me to lunch? I don't know - after all - I barely know you!"