Domestic Chore Champion Gifts

Wife taking a photo of her husband and their shoveled walk-way

'My wife gave me that one for washing the windows.'

"And now your General Knowledge Round...Where does clean laundry come from?"

'Did they have anything at the job centre?'

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

Kitchen Tetris

The Last Leaf

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

Family working together

"Yes dear, you have worked very hard on the garden. Unfortunately though, you've put the compost on the weeds and the weed killer on my best roses."

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

'He's not here right now. He's out pumping iron.'

Fashion Update Dryer Sheets

"Hey, Dad, I've been working on a song for our family band!"

"She leaves wooden-handled knives soaking in the dishwater all night long. Your Honor."

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

"I want an instant replay of you taking out the garbage."

"Hey, the last thing I want to do is annoy you. That's actually ninth on my to-do list."

"O.K., so I shrank. But you must admit I am brighter."

"The last time we ordered take-out I was up all night doing laundry."

"I woke up early, took a shower, got dressed for work then remembered I don't work today."

"Honest, Dad, somethin's wrong with the lawnmower." "You look fine to me. When you finish the lawn and pullin weeds feel free to wash the car and paint the house."

'Don't think of sweeping as a chore. Consider it practice for the Olympic Curling Team.'

Sue believed that one day she would find her soul mate - and her missing sock.

Dating Agency: "I am looking for a man whose hobbies are, washing up, dusting and ironing."

"Honest Dad, I was going to mow the lawn... But I can't find the lawnmower in here!"

"I'm helping Mom wash the dishes."

"Oh, gosh. . . he's sleep caulking again."

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

'We already have a helper monkey for that.'

A day of domestics...

"You must be married, and well trained."

'Mr. big shot scientist who works 18 hours a day at a prestigious lab developing high strength corrosion inhibitors, but can I get him to spend 2 minutes getting rust stains out of our own tub? No.'

How to communicate with a man.