Dollar Store Explorer Gifts

"Baldo, Gracie...you need to learn more Spanish. For the rest of the week, I'm going to speak nothing but Spanish, and Tia Carmen will act as your interpreter, OK? Tienen tarea?"

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

"How soon will this be a remnant

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

"I'm part of the problem and loving it!"

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

Cannabis Dispensary: Walk-ins awkwardly trying to look nonchalant welcome!

"No, we're not buying that cereal - do you know how much sugar it contains?! Not nearly enough!"

"Class, welcome back Sean ... who, you may recall, was lost for eight days in Home Depot."

Sign on a sale bin at a bookstore that reads "Latte-Damaged Books".

'Which dog is named 'BOGART'?'

"Do you have these apples in green?"

'Sale' 'Your money back if we feel like it'

Retro Fashions door sign reads 'Out to lunch -back before you know it.'

'I don't care as long as don't end up being eaten over a sink.'

"Attention, shoppers. We have a lost boomer at the information desk."

'I just asked if you were finding everything alright. I never said I worked here.'

'I bought it off the irregular rack, but I'm hoping he'll grow into it.'

"This would be perfect! If it were a different style, in a different color, from a different store."

'Dear, this is gift shop number 3. You now owe me 1 bait & tackle, 1 hardware store, and a bar.'

"Putting the Christ back in Christmas."

"It might be this Christmas, it might be next."

"I'm discharging you early - administration wants to make sure you have time to visit the gift shop before it closes."

'I don't care if you got it at the dollar store...GET THAT BIB OFF OF MY SON!!!'

"I want to travel the world, bringing home ugly little trinkets."

"Attention, shoppers!! We have a senior lost in the produce section!. . ."

"I think the odour eaters have eaten my brie sandwiches!"

Walmart vs. Target.

"Do you have anything new. . ?"

'Must you get new clothes every season? I'm still wearing stuff I got years ago.'

Thrift Store. Maybe society would be less polarized if everybody bought used footwear. We learn a lot by walking in somebody else's shoes.