Doggie Giggler T-Shirts

'He's a great dog...a bit of a drooler though.'

The Busy Gardener

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

"Garden variety allergies."

"Hello Mr Flower. You've got a pretty face. But your feet are filthy."

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Beginning Yarder.

Yard Sale

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'...and this is the water garden...'

'I wish to refer you to a tree surgeon. You have all the symptoms of Dutch Elm disease!'

Balding gnomes

'Where are you going?'

"I'd like me first word to be profound, but I'll probably panic and blurt out 'Mama' like every other baby."

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."

'Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, feel sorry for the people who have to work with you.'

"I now recognize the basement was a bad idea."

'There goes the squeak in your brakes, Mrs. Ferguson.'

'I'm not making a mess, Mom -- I'm becoming one with the Earth!'

"I used to have A Green thumb but it was mainly for hedge funds."