Dog House Architect Gifts

'It's my first dog house with indoor plumbing.'

'I need $600 to build a dog house: $210 for materials and labor, $150 for a permit, and $140 for an environmental impact statement.'

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

Tidy it up for the open house, and it wouldn't hurt to put out some freshly regurgitated worms. For sale.

Joys of D.I.Y.

"Are you sure it's okay for cardinals to live at a Protestant church?"

'Very nice, but is there room to swing a cat?'

"That could've been ours. But noooo...You and your DIY."

"Just imagine this room fully carpeted with multi-level platforms and cubbies."

'The ranch-style house is for our wiener dog.'

Bird wife unhappy with the state of their birdhouse.

Man and boy looking at a birdhouse they have just built. It has a vacancy sign outside it like a motel.

'Another DIY enthusiast methinks...'

"It's their idea of cute."

Council tax inspector notes dog kennel: 'Clearly, this property has its own entrance.'

"The house needs to have comfortable window ledges. Lots of windows! And a fireplace!"

'If it happened at your birdhouse, your homeowner's insurance should cover it.'

Lady feeding birds from her car.

No, it doesn't come furnished.

Oh wow. Love your work.

"The seller is highly unmotivated."

Birdhouse Apartments

Bird building a nest under a bird box rather than in it

Cuckoo bird to caged bird: 'I cuckoo every hour! Is it any wonder I'm a little crazy?'

Bird box with amenities (plumbing, electricity).

"It's just the architect's model, but I'm very excited."

'If we upgrade the feeder, we could attract a higher class of birds.'

"I found a way to pay the mortgage. I sold the naming rights to the house."

Birdhouse Shapes

'Still no takers, did it ever occur to you that they may not like the neighbourhood?'

Dog House Hunters

Man and boy looking at a birdhouse they have just built. It has a vacancy sign outside it like a motel.

"Well, that's done! Now all we need to do is build a dog!"

'We made a diagnosis! He needs a larger doghouse!'

I wouldn't make an offer until you get the inspector's report. For sale.