Dog Food Enthusiast Gifts

"He won't wait for me to open the can."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

Dog Chow Mein

"For what he is about to receive may the dog be truly thankful."

"I can never remember, how much do we tip?"

'Rover is sulking because he helped bag the goose and all he gets for dinner is dog food.'

"Kibbled, canned and frozen were non-starters. But he'll often accept a ice ribeye as long as it's been properly dry aged."

Free range cat food - mice running around the store.

"It's the first edition of 'How dogs know what their owners are bringing home for dinner'."

'Sure, it's a nice buffet, but I can't help thinking it's a bit morbid...'

Posh dog views expensive food and wine.

'I don't care if top breeders do recommend it - I am not going to eat dog food!'

'I pity the poor schlub whose job it is to make that call.'

"Look, I’m sorry - it’s not Asian fusion night!"

Dog Food: Lick & Collect

'I'm sorry Jane, but this time your anthropomorphism has gone too far.'

'Dang! Oh well, I won't have to feed him for a year now.'

Frankfurters on a Bus

"Some dehydrated corn and bone meal for the gentleman, perhaps?"

"I'm getting a little peckish. Hey! How dare you ignore me. I don't care if I have to go out or not, I'm waking you up at 4 a.m."

'So you want two opposable thumbs so you can open your own dogfood?'

Colin had standards, and not eating 'own brand' food was one of them.....

"We'll be needing a high chair for spot."

'Believe me, I've checked. There are no shows on the Food Channel devoted to cooking kibble.'

"Wait! I forgot the garnish."

You tell me how they know it has new and improved flavour!

Limits of Canine Philosophical Inquiry.

'I'll take your word for it that dog food tastes good on crackers.'

"Have you got a book about the proper way of feeding a dog?"

'I can understand my mother and my first-grade teacher being there, but there's also a TV announcer who does dog commercials and a second-string catcher for the Detroit Tigers.'