Dog Food Aficionado Gifts

"Well, I won't be asking 'what's for dinner' for awhile."

'Rover is sulking because he helped bag the goose and all he gets for dinner is dog food.'

'I don't care if top breeders do recommend it - I am not going to eat dog food!'

'I can understand my mother and my first-grade teacher being there, but there's also a TV announcer who does dog commercials and a second-string catcher for the Detroit Tigers.'

'Dang! Oh well, I won't have to feed him for a year now.'

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

Dog Chow Mein

"I can never remember, how much do we tip?"

Dog orders the food 9 out of 10 dogs prefer.

"For what he is about to receive may the dog be truly thankful."

Free range cat food - mice running around the store.

"For this dish we'll need to sauté the onion with the week-old, moldy, ant-covered French fry over medium heat. Then, we lightly flash boil our dehydrated mouse..."

"Kibbled, canned and frozen were non-starters. But he'll often accept a ice ribeye as long as it's been properly dry aged."

"It's the first edition of 'How dogs know what their owners are bringing home for dinner'."

'Sure, it's a nice buffet, but I can't help thinking it's a bit morbid...'

"He won't wait for me to open the can."

"Look, I’m sorry - it’s not Asian fusion night!"

'I pity the poor schlub whose job it is to make that call.'

Dog Food: Lick & Collect

"I'm getting a little peckish. Hey! How dare you ignore me. I don't care if I have to go out or not, I'm waking you up at 4 a.m."

"Some dehydrated corn and bone meal for the gentleman, perhaps?"

Colin had standards, and not eating 'own brand' food was one of them.....

'So you want two opposable thumbs so you can open your own dogfood?'

You tell me how they know it has new and improved flavour!

"Wait! I forgot the garnish."

"We'll be needing a high chair for spot."

Limits of Canine Philosophical Inquiry.

'I'll take your word for it that dog food tastes good on crackers.'

The Four Basic Food Groups - Dry, moist, biscuit, bone.

"Have you got a book about the proper way of feeding a dog?"