Dog Breed Detective Pillows

Pedigreed dog/Generic dog.

"Obviously, somebody screwed up somewhere."

"I'm tripping over bernedoodles, labradoodles, goldendoodles, schnoodles and cockapoos, ...and you want me to somehow believe you're not sleeping around?"

"Airedale, what's yours?"

She's a Labrachihuashepoodle hound.

Barks in code.

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

Murder in Apartment 6-K

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

'So who needs sonar?!'

"Hello? Is that the canine help line?...."

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

"Pssst. Fake poop."

Sergeant Jones gave the assurance that they had an 'assortment' of leads back at the station. . .

'The word bath is mentioned.'

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

Man to pets about upside down house: 'I don't care who started it!'

"What's all this?"

-'Okay Rebel, find the drugs.' -'Are you kidding? There's dirty underwear here!'

"My client was across town at the time of the murder, as a quick sniff of Exhibit A will demonstrate."

Fido and Fifi

"Now how did she know?"

"If you could live your life all over again, what dead animals would you roll in?"

"That's why I don't use those dog carriers."

"You're not a police dog, and that's not a crime scene."

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

'This article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that.'

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

"I take it you want to go for a perp walk."