Dog Behavior Satirist T-Shirts

Idiot Dog.

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

'I'd like to return this, please.'

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

"Now turn your head and bark."

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

"Pssst. Fake poop."

"Yeah well, now that we're married, he's not making any effort: he hasn't been to a grooming appointment in months!"

"Then he suggested we go to a leash optional beach."

"It's my helper trout!"

Dogs texting each other emojis

"I did, boss, I swear, I buried him myself."

"I need a hip replacement but I believe they're looking at a dog replacement."

"There are those who say I'm a throwback to Monet."

"Sometimes Bob wags when he's happy—but these days, it usually means he just tooted."

'Trouble is, he rubbed my nose in it'

"Look, Mommy. Puppy already knows a trick! What should we call him?" "How about 'Scooter.'"

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

"She never took to the leash."

"I think that I shall never see a tree on which I wouldn't pee."

Woman Walking a Trojan Horse

'You seem pretty wound up today.'

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

Select a song: Another Dog Barking. Lots of Other Dogs Barking. Howling. Siren. Doorbell. Dog Karaoke.

"Are you walking the dog? We live on the third floor!"

"My human can't tell which end is which."

Dog leaving operating theatre in a hurry with a bone in his mouth

Strikeout Dog

'I'm afraid you're just going to have to accept that dogs just don't like you.'

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

"Gas was passed, you get the blame, that's the system."

Heaven's Cattlegrid.