Documentary Lover Gifts

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

"Don't adjust the set dear, it's a documentary about stalactites."

'And when everyone got bored with 'hunting' and 'gathering', someone invented the stock exchange...and the rest is history.'

Obese Kids Documentary.

'Now for the last programme in our series 'alternative sources of energy'.'

"In order to survive the shark needs to move constantly."

A fly on the wall documentary.

Diana Inquest - 'It's time to move on, and start making a TV mini-series of her life.'

'Colin's attempts to convince friends that his 45' surround sound flatscreen TV was purely for nature documentaries was doomed to fail.'

"Sorry, but we are temporarily closed. Our servers are down."

". . . Unlike the feel-good portion of World War II."

"Good heavens! There's not a single documentary about World War 2!"

"Wow, I was in a documentary film with Ron and Valerie Taylor too! Aren't they great?!"

"After the shark documentary there's a documentary on about two fat slobs who watch TV all day. Sounds good"

"And for those of you who don't like docu-soaps look away now"

"We've streamed everything except this documentary on documentaries."

Sister Wendy

The naturalist Sir David Shuttleboro had a life long affinity with wild life.

Mother says to surly teenage daughter: 'I've had enough of this, young lady! You treat this house like a fly-on-the-wall documentary.'

'They want the widest possible audience.'

Tonight's Weather Report Contains Some Alarming Material. Viewer Discretion Advised.

'Honey, you should have told me our family was piked for a Reality Series.'

Terrorists are already here.

"It's slow everywhere right now. For crying out loud, Boris, it's shark week."