Document Management Gifts

'I can't remember the title,but it was on a little white piece of paper.'

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'

"That's my storage shed. It's where I keep all the densely worded, multi-page documents I've ever received and have no intention of reading."

In and Out Trays

Desk Organizers: 'He Said' and 'She Said'.

Shred-a Data - We shred into much smaller pieces.

"Larry?!"

"Walking dead letter file."

After forty-seven years in management, it was only appropriate that he be buried in paperwork.

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

'In, out, fiddling.'

'Big clear out time. Destroy all old paperwork, but before you shred it, better make photocopies of everything just to be on the safe side. . .'

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

'I have created the first interactive pile of paperwork.'

'No, they're extra sensitive, so puree them.'

"First rule of accountancy, NEVER mention the shredder."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

Trays on desk read: In/Out/Lose in the Shuffle.

'Never trust emails. You can't shred them.'

Bureau to cut back on bureaucratic paperwork...

Today's alpha-lesson is "Keep a journal." The average person lets life pass them by. The events of their lives fade into nothingness. An alpha knows that long after they're gone, their thoughts and experiences will be of great interest to historians. That's not an original thought. I read it in the papyrus Randus Maximus XIV left in a safe deposit box after he helped conquer Judea.

A man looking at a piece of art through a phone camera

Top Secret/Middle Secret/Bottom Secret

Records?

"We need a better piling system."

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

Paper Trail

'She files things on a biblical basis. Seek and ye shall find.'

'They'll never take my word for it -- You'd better put them in writing.'

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

Bureau of Red Tape

Boss talking to lawyer, 'These new Terms and Conditions you've drafted for us are extremely long and overly complex - our customers are never going to be able to understand them. Well done Jones!'