Diy Tax Preparer T-Shirts

'Instead of paying an income tax expert to do my return, I paid myself. What's wrong with that?'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

'Check with legal and find out -- maybe we're a non-profit.'

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

I'm afraid neatness doesn't count, Mrs Wilson

"Says, property of the I.R.S."

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

The IRS emptied my pouch.

IRS Audit Section

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

The Forever Stamp

The president of a company see a sign: While you were out we hit the lottery!

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

'Right now I'm counting the blessings that we owe to Uncle Sam.'

"Amazing deduction, Holmes!"

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

"I still have my loophole, but I can't drive a truck through it."

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

'Which scares you most - Iran, North Korea, or the alternative minimum tax?'

Man posting letter to the IRS.

Tax Collector

"Taxation, meet Representation."

IRS tax instructions.

'I'm very sorry, sir. Even for stressed out bankers, whiskey and gin aren't tax-deductible expenses.'

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

'I'm here about the tax credits for business equipment which you listed in your return as 'Betty', 'Mabel', 'Liz'...'

'Don't get your hopes up, I'm only laughing excessively...'

You may go free, to worry about tax and the economy like the rest of us.