Divine Strategists Pillows

"Attendance is way down. He's just trying to jazz up the place..."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

Ideas Ahead of their Time

"He was furiously reading the Bible before he died." "Looking for loopholes."

Frank and Ernest Celestial Accountants. How's the audit of the Bankrupt Universe, Inc. going, Ernie? At first I thought it was a personnel problem -- Halley's Comet shows up once every seventy-six years, the supernovas are a bunch of burnouts and of course planet Mercury only works eighty-eight days a year. But the real problem isn't personnel, it's corporate strategy! Strategy? What's wrong? Universe, Inc. thinks it can keep expanding and expanding forever and ever!

"I think your going to need a business plan."

"I'm not only a Guardian Angel, I'm also an expert at turnarounds."

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

"Because of the economic situation they've relaxed the rules."

'What do you mean you can't find the key?'

'Don't throw the little silicon chips away -- we may find a use for them someday.'

"And, finally, to my wife, my love and appreciation for her understanding and critical insights, without whom this project would never have been accomplished."

Wall St Baptist: 'Life is exactly like the stock market exchange and we each have our own portfolio to manage.'

'Another invention? -- You are SUCH a geek!'

"Once he invented the wheel, it was only a matter of time before he came up with the food truck."

'Let's take a minute to allow the bad karma of the old regime to lift.'

"Grog understand supply and demand."

"I want to take a vacation, but the last time I left you in charge your face appeared on a grilled cheese sandwich."

'How do you expect to play Canasta when you left your brain to science?'

'No, you can't write off the cost of your wake-up call service.'

Man discovers the wheel, sort of.

Dummy. Now we have to apply for another grant.

'Don't throw the little silicon chips away -- we may find a use for them someday.'

"First, I storyboarded it."

"Vote Hunter for Gatherer."

Uh-oh, They're evolving!

"I'm thinking seven days and I'll do it in real time."

Possible Merger Talks

'That's one hell of a lawyer.'

'Of COURSE we appreciate having someone with your expertise in mergers and acquisitions, but offhand I can't think of another corporation that would match up with ours.'

'Change, change, change - all we ever seem to get is change!'

'I want to be the first person to land on the sun.'

Cave Men - Early Business Failures.

The inventions of baseball