Divine Puppeteer T-Shirts

"Hmmm...says here that you were in charge of your church's Puppet Ministry."

Leslie Caron.

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"All we have left is standing room only."

'I said you're next, Hibblemeyer. . . Hibblemeyer!'

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

Silhouette hawk swooping down to catch a silhouette rabbit.

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

"Beware of God"

Angel doing the hula hoop.

Finger puppets in church.

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

Newton's cradle

"The amendments are coming next week!"

Ventriloquist Audition

"Gasp! Pant! Is it good for you, Marjorie?"

'Telling me He works in mysterious ways!'

"Sorry, I can't - I have to be everywhere."

"The militant hard-liners are making demands, the fanatical zealots are issuing threats, and the moderate centrists are offering suggestions."

Hand Puppets for all ages (Especially 3 or 4).

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

God sends a text message: 'OMME!'

'Sorry, pastor, your soul's grace period is eternity, your car's is six minutes.'

"And the Lord he sayeth 'doest thou thinkest I knoweth not who sniggereth at the back there?'"

And the Lord said: 'I created the universe. What on earth makes you think I'll be impressed by a dead goat?'

Boy makes a finger shadow on the tent.

"Relax, I grade on the curve."

Half time entertainment at many small clubs was a bit basic.

"The first bill is always a shock-everyone thinks Heaven will be free."

'I think it's some kind of power point presentation.'

"I want to take a vacation, but the last time I left you in charge your face appeared on a grilled cheese sandwich."

'Got to keep the little ones entertained!'